In case you missed it, here is the interview I did this morning with the lovely Larry Flick & Keith!

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I gotta say I feel ALIVE and invigorated! I’ve been working on this project, and I am almost done!! It has inspired me, I finally feel like a complete person again, which I have been missing for some time.  I feel independent, because I am doing it all on my lonesome, and creative, which is hard for me to feel without working with other people.  Well no, it is not hard for me to feel creative, but I generally consider myself the type of person who doesn’t like to work alone, I love being around people.  This is one of the few things I have made alone, and enjoyed making alone.  It’s not the most high tech amazing thing in the world, but the fact that I made it and made it by myself makes me happier than anything, and I think it is pretty cool.  Especially knowing that I did something 1,337 times so far and I am not done. 17 more seconds to finish and then I am done.  I can’t wait for you guys to see it.  I feel a kid again in school making art projects.  I like problem solving, how do I get this to do this, and if something isn’t working you gotta figure out a way around it.  This is uniting all the things I love about being creative into one mold, music that I made, with the other thing I love directing.  Almost done, a few more days!!! One or two at most!! I am excited for you guys to see my project!

xo, a very psyched cce

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Hello There!

I have been M.I.A. from the bloggity blog world for quite some time.  Also no stickam chats or anything. I just wasn’t in the mood. To be honest I was seriously down in the dumps. I sort of knew why, just professional shit, nothing on the home front.  I am by nature a very upbeat person, so when I get depressed it is serious bizzness. I even got a perscription for Wellbutrin which I never started taking (I don’t like to take any medication if I don’t HAVE to).  But it seemed serious enough that I should look into it, so with me questioning my life and what I was doing and where I am going it seemed like a bad time to give advice and I don’t want to be a downer, so I try and remain upbeat publically ya know when in reality I was in the poop zone.

Anyways, back to my original point.  I have never considered myself an “artist”, maybe it’s because my parents were art dealers and I grew up in a world where artists were fucking dickheads and thought their shit didn’t stink and would artspeak even the lamest crap. Don’t get me wrong I consider myself creative, but never an artist. Or maybe rather an ‘artiste’.  Definetly not a fine artist by any means, the only reason I end up creating any sort of fine art is a sort of means to an end, it serves a purpose and not because I just NEED to create something.  I have never had that urge where I MUST draw or paint or write a song. The only urge I feel sometimes is I need to sing, and then I do, or I want to perform, but rarely get to.  If anyone asked me what I was I would probably say an “entertainer”, rather that artist.  Regardless, I have been feeling stifled, I guessed why but didn’t know for sure that it was due to my lack of creating.  I was feeling powerless, trapped, and impotent (just a better word for powerless), it was making me uber depressed.  It was effecting me in every aspect of my life.  Alas, I got home from New York a few weeks ago and felt like I needed to do SOMETHING!!  I had an idea of what I wanted to do and I told James my plan and he was like “WTF?! Are you crazy?! Have you ever done that before?”. To which I replied “no”.  But fuck, I never let that stop me from doing anything, I am pretty gung ho once I decide on making something happen. So I started working on it and voila, I felt like a fucking person again, maybe because it’s a project that I am in complete control of, or because I am creating something, or just the act of being creative. But you know what I guess I am an artist. I guess it isn’t always a dirty word, just sometimes it gets manipulated and the people that call themselves artists are not people I want to be like.  But I am creating and it feels wonderful. I can’t wait to show you all what I have been working on.  It will be done in a few weeks.

hope you are all doing well.

xo, cce

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